English: Long flight of stairs. Huntsville, AL
Long flight of stairs. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Usually, when people tell me about their bad day and the stuff that has happened to them… I find humor in it and try to hold in my laughter as they finish the story.  Because, I know that from the view of that person it was a horrible experience.  Although, it is not funny to laugh at their distress I find I usually can’t help myself.

That being said… I had a bad day yesterday really, bad and I feel from someone’s elses point of view the day is probably pretty funny.  Even when I think back on it … now that it is over, I can find humor in it.

So here it goes…. My day begins at 4 am… I am sleeping soundly but I hear my husband wake up to go to the bathroom…. However, the sound doesn’t sound normal… so I get up to see.. that he was still asleep and had walked into the kitchen and was peeing in the middle of the floor, thinking it was the toilet…. I panicked and turned on the light and shouted .. What are you doing? That isn’t the bathroom…. Well… Note to self: Never shout at a man who is half sleep going to the bathroom.. because when he turns around due to the fact that you have startled him… he will pee all over you.

That being peed on experience prompted an argument and me taking a shower at 4 am.  Therefore, I didn’t get back to sleep until 6 am and I had to wake up at 8 am to go to work.  When I got to work exhausted and sleepy… I was informed that I had 5 classes in a row starting at 1pm, causing me work overtime.  I was not a happy camper and was grumpy anyway.. since they had not forwarned me about the schedule.   They also had no idea what I was supposed to teach these students or even why a couple of them where there…. I was walking around the office slamming things around talking to myself, when my boss informed me that I should go home and come back in the afternoon.  I guess he could feel I was not 100% and I needed to cool off.  I went home directly and went to bed to catch up on some sleep hoping things would be better after a couple of hours.

After about an hour, I heard my front door open and someone walk into the apartment.  I knew it wasn’t Michael because he was at work and he makes a lot of noise when he comes home.   I slowly got out of bed and picked up my high heel and tip-toed into the living room with the shoe up over my head ready to take out who ever had shown up unannounced into our home.   When I rounded the corner, I saw my father-in-law also was prepared to take someone out.   We both scared each other and shouted outloud… and were both relieved to not have killed each other.  Me with a shoe and him with a book.

Evidently, my husband neglected to tell me that my in-laws would be visiting.   I called my husband and asked him if he had forgotten something, and he quickly apologized and then asked why I was home?  My father-in-law proceeded to cook us lunch and clean my kitchen (that is what the in-laws do in China) and my husband arrived home shortly and after a quick-lunch, I went back to school and proceeded to be overwhelmed with students that for some reason could not remember any English that anyone ever taught them.  (or maybe it was me still feeling sleepy)

At 6pm after a frustrating day of dealing with non-English speaking students; I headed back home to find that my mother-in-law had joined the party and the two of them were talking to my husband about what they where going to cook us for dinner.  I said hello to all of them.. and politely told them decided to go to bed.  They however, wanted to wait for me to eat with them.  So after about an hour and a half of sleep, my husband came and woke me up and said hurry it is time to eat.  Still, half asleep myself… I wandered into the dinning room and didn’t see any food.  I was informed that they had set up a picnic like dinner on the coffee table and they were all sitting on little stools waiting for me.   I am a big, girl and sitting on a little stool about 12 inches off the ground is not very comfortable and barely feasible.  Which they all noticed when I was trying to sit on the tiny stool and failing to balance properly without falling off it.  After a couple of tries, my husband went to pull the living room chair over close to the coffee table.  Dinner went okay, all Chinese local traditional foods but they included a few things I liked to eat.   That is when my dear husband suggested that his mother and I go for a walk outside to see the shops after dinner.   Although, I was still tired I smiled and agreed, while sending knife stares at my husband.  I know it is his way of his mother and I bonding but it was really not a good day for me.

We got our shoes on and I picked up my bag and made sure I had my Iphone with the dictionary inside so I could make sure communication would not be a problem.  I probably should let you guys know that I live on the 3rd floor of a building that has 6 flights of stairs to walk up and down every day to get to the 3rd floor.  Chinese way of counting is crazy.  Anyway, we opened the door and I was making sure I had everything for this walk and when I turned around I was too close to the first step and …… Wait for it.…… Wait for it.…… Yes, I fell down the flight of stairs….. my mother-in-law…. screamed and started shouting for my husband….. and trying to pick me up…(she is about 98 pounds.. so she was really just in the way of me picking myself up)... Michael came out the door and ran to the top of the stairs and looked down at me and said….. and I quote “What are you doing? …. I have no words”…….I quickly felt around my body while I was on the ground and noticed nothing was broken my arse had taken the brunt of the fall… (thank God it is big)…. my bracelets were broken, and my shoe was broken (they were heels by the way) But clutched in my hand in a death grip was that .. Damn, Iphone…. after all I paid for that thing… I guess my body reacted that it is not going to let that hit the ground.

Needless to say, my pride hurt a lot more than my body… but being the trooper I am…. I got back up… went back up those stairs… changed into flat shoes…. and informed my Mother-in-law that I was okay… she was checking my body everywhere…. and telling me never mind on the walk, but I was saying… yes… we are going to walk…I was determined…  so, I grabbed her arm and we walked back down those stairs.    She was worried the whole time… continuing to ask me if I was okay or hurt… and I just held my head high and keep walking …. I told her in Chinese… Don’t worry I am a big girl… very strong… after our 15 minute walk.  We got back home… and I sat down in the cushy chair..exhausted and a little sore from the fall… and thought about the day.  My husband looked at me pitifully and said… come on you need to go to bed.

He walked me to the bedroom, helped me take off my clothes and then laid beside me .. and said….trying to keep a smile off his face….. Honey, I can’t believe you fell down a flight of stairs..… I looked at him and said…. I know .. I could have broken my hip…. we just looked at each other and started laughing.   I said your mother tried to pick me up…. we had tears in our eyes.. .picturing a 5′ , 98 pound woman trying to pick up my …. big arse.   After we laughed it off, he said he was worried and for me to take better care of myself and to be careful, because he could not have picked me up either at 5’4, 105 pounds… we laughed again…at that and I fell asleep in his arms…. hoping for a do over day when I woke up.


until next time…..