Wow.. the end of the year .. and what a year its been…. I have had so much that has happened this year I wanted to do a kind of list of things that have happened the good, the bad and the ugly.

1) Started the year with the usual intent to do something interesting and exciting. So I became a shareholder/partner of the local bar in Bin Jiang District in Hangzhou city.  This was a good move and has proved to be a door for many things.

My Bar family

My Bar family

2) Beginning of the year I also got divorced.  This was one of those ugly things.. but it proved to be the best thing that ever happened to me.  I realized that I need to really consider my own feelings and happiness instead of focusing on making other people happy.   After the divorce I started dating and that was a whole lot of drama.

3) I got promoted at my school to Head of Student Management… but then after a month it was taken away and the position was eliminated.   That how things roll in china when you work for a Chinese company.  They will just move you up and down without a care to your career goals.

4) Started dating a guitarist and started learning guitar.  No matter how much of an asshole he turned out to be.. I still have to thank him for introducing me to the guitar… I am enjoying every minute of my learning experience.  Although I lost my free teacher, yYouTube has been a great help to me.

Brown Rice... Rock N Roll Baby

Brown Rice… Rock N Roll Baby

5) I started my own band Brown Rice… and sing rock cover songs at the bar.  I get a lot of  adrenalin from playing in a band and being the lead singer was like an impossible dream come true.  I may not be the new Joan Jett.. but I can cross that off my bucket list.

6) I became the Asst. General Manager of the bar.  Yes.. they saw the potential i had in management and the skill I have in advertising and marketing.. which I love, love, love…. that is the job I live for.   So I stepped down from being the lead singer of the band and became the band’s manager and bar manager…. while still teaching of course….(gonna keep the big money coming in)

7) I briefly dated a Chinese Biker… I am all about the wild and the crazy…. and dating a biker although short-lived was very exciting and wild..(that is basically why I had to cut it a little short… a little too wild) but made some wonderful new biker friends that will probably last a life time.IMG_5275

8) Big changes at my teaching job… the company decided to change locations to a town about an hour away from where I currently live.  I have to ride the bus…. to and from work.. an hour each way … everyday…. Makes me consider some career changes.

My first big tattoo... Black Orchids... (also my chinese name.. Hei Lan)

My first big tattoo… Black Orchids… (also my chinese name.. Hei Lan)

9) I got some new tattoos.. yep.. I am a tattooed bitch.. the cool thing about tattoos is that you can control what you want to put on your body.. and it doesn’t matter what anyone says… it’s very freeing.

10) Met the current man of my dreams….. Jet… a former gangster turn good… and a man who will do anything to keep me happy.  The sweetest kindest man.. I have ever met in my life honestly. If I was ever going to marry again… in the far, far, far future… this would be the man.

My man... Jet Liu

My man… Jet Liu

11) I decided to by an ebike.. yep.. after living in china for now 8 years.. I broke down and bought an electric bike.. that everyone rides here.. Jet taught me to ride it properly and now I am riding like a …. BOSS!

12) Found out that my recently divorced ex-husband remarried six months after our divorce.  Kind of quick?  Maybe that tells me that he had someone on the side.  He married a local Chinese girl… I don’t wish him bad luck.. but Karma.. my have other ideas.

13) I decided to do my own business here in China.. it is very complicated to know all the freakin’ rules here.. but with some very good “relationships” that I have formed over the years.. and my stud by my side….. I am going to get this done.  I have started putting together a clothing line.. for club wear.. ladies that are Divas… in charge of their lives.   People who are proud of their bodies no matter what size they are.  My new company is called “Dragon Designs”  I am going to be selling on and… and working on my own site.

My inspiration for my company name... Jet's amazing dragon tattoo..

My inspiration for my company name… Jet’s amazing dragon tattoo..

I am really trying to start preparing for my future retirement business.  Oh know I will never stop working and stop experiencing life.. I just can’t that would be crazy.  I am now deciding on which country to retire in.   I am thinking either Malaysia, Philippines, or Colombia, South America.  Whether I eventually marry Jet or not… that is my plan.   Why not come back to the states? Well, I have realized that my life has improve tremendously since I move away… and I feel less stressed and less overwhelmed.   I love my country and I will never give up being American… I love being American.. and I will visit my family as much as I can… but  for me… living abroad is a good thing.  And from what I can see on the news these days a little safer.  I hope to bring my kids to visit me when I retire… for now I will visit them in the states every year or so.

So that’s kind of my life in review over that past year… there has been some crazy moments.. and some great  times. I have met many great people and did some great performances, like when I dresses as an avenging angel on Halloween.

Halloween 2014.. at the Bar... great performance

Halloween 2014.. at the Bar… great performance

What will the New year bring?  Hopefully… more love, joy and happiness.  I also hope there will be great success in my new business venture.  I have learned to live life to the fullest and not to worry about what others say about you.. but… Honey…. You only have this life.. make it Amazing…..Boo

Until Next Time…..

Some of you guys have been studying and practicing Chinese.  My friends over at Nin are having a challenge.. check it out it sounds like fun.
We’re launching a friendly and competitive event next week over the knowledge of Chinese: a Ninchallenge Tournament! Would you be interested in sharing this news with your readers and followers?

The Ninchallenge Tournament will be a two-week long tournament where Chinese learners play battles – called Ninchallenges – against other Chinese learners over their knowledge of Chinese vocabulary.  Through the Ninchallenge Tournament, our goal is to offer Chinese learners a fun atmosphere in which:
– they can practice their Chinese vocabulary
– discover new words
– play with other Chinese learners
– demonstrate their Chinese skills and win cool prizes.

This is the very first Ninchallenge Tournament we at Ninchanese organize. We’re launching it to support our Kickstarter campaign( which is currently live here: We want the Tournament to be entirely about having fun practicing Chinese this summer. The Tournament is free and open to all Chinese learners worldwide.

Registration is now open:  Those interested in joining the tournament can start signing up on The Ninchallenge tournament starts on the 13th and will run until the 26th of July.

until next time……

Guys… I am telling you the Chinese toilets are bound to kill me one day…. they are after me….. don’t laugh…. my latest encounter…. is the battle of the iPhone….

Just two weeks ago… I was rushing off to class… and I realized I had to go to the bathroom… and knowing I only have five minutes…I showed up in class..put down my books and laptop…. on the desk… and told the class I will be right back…. I am running to the bathroom.

Now I usually carry my phone in my bra… that way… my girls protect it…. but this day..I wore pants with back pockets…so ..I slide the phone there .. so I could … carry all my other stuff…..

I ran to the bathroom.. and I had waited a little longer than I should have.. so I was dancing around trying to get my pants down without peeing on myself….. then …. I heard and saw it at the same time…. I pulled down my pants and plop….. my phone fell down in the hole…. it did not stop… it did not pass go.. it just made a hole in one…. right into the toilet….

squatty potty

I really didn’t have time to think about it.. because I still had to go pee…. so I just squatted over my phone … and peed and cried at the same time…… there was no way… I was going to stick my hand down a Chinese toilet to get my phone back anyway…. and it wouldn’t have worked if I had retrieved it… so I just peed and cried…. until… all the water was out of my body….my heart was broken… that is the second phone… in two years .. I have dropped down a toilet…the other one was at a bar.. and I grabbed it.. but the water had already ruined it….the man at the Apple shop said… the water had been to contaminated…. figures…

So … the war.. is on.   Chinese Toilets vs Jo…… I already have trouble using the damn things…. my pee doesn’t want to cooperate .. and sometimes.. I can’t hit the stupid hole…… or there are days… I can’t get back up…. and there are no handles to pull yourself back up…. (which I have requested.. and no one listens to me).    Calling someone to the stall to help you stand up .. is not common behavior.

One Canadian lady.. had a funnel…. and went in the stall…. I asked her.. when she came out… and was washing it in the sink what was that for… she said… so she can hit the hole…. we both laughed….. however.. carrying a funnel to the bathroom everyday at school might look kind of strange.

My students got a big kick out of Teacher Jo dropping her phone in the toilet.   They all made phone jokes… throughout the day…. in their speeches.. they said things like…. “to use your phone to study English is very helpful… unless you have dropped it in the toilet and you have no phone” ... the little bastards…. aren’t funny…..

So… this week I am buying a new phone…. and of course Jet suggested I buy the largest phone on the I don’t throw it in the toilet…. I informed him… I didn’t THROW it … it fell….he just shook his head….no happy ending for him tonight.

So… boys and girls…. I have declared war…. and I will not let the Chinese toilet win….. I will wrap the phone tightly around my neck…. or duct tape it to my body… but it will not.. fall in the toilet again, Damn it.


until next time…..

Life behind the wall

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March 2013

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